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BILLAVA MARRIAGE CUSTOMS AND CEREMONIES

BILLAVA MARRIAGE CUSTOMS AND CEREMONIES

A few days before the wedding the maternal uncle of the bride or the 'Gurkara' ties a jewel on her neck, and a pandal is erected, and decorated by the caste washerman (madival) with clothes of different colours. If the Bridegroom is an adult, the bride has to undergo a purificatory ceremony a day or two before marriage (dhara) day. A few women, usually near of the girl, go to a tank, pond or well near a bhutasthana or garadi, and bring water thence in earthenware pots. The water is poured over the head of the girl, and she bathes. On the wedding day, the bride and bridegroom are seated on two planks placed on the dais. The Barber arranges the various articles, such as lights, rice, flowers, betel leaves and arecanuts, and a vessel filled with water, all of which are required for the ceremonial. He Joins the hands of the contracting couple, and their parents, or the headman, places the nose-screw of the bride on their hands, and pour the dhare water over them. This is the binding part of the ceremony which is called kai (hand) Dhare. 

In the Billava community, marriage rules are strongly guided by the Bari system (clan/lineage system). Here’s how it works:

🔹 Basic Rule

  • Same Bari marriage is strictly prohibited.

    • Example: A boy from Suvarna Bari cannot marry a girl from Suvarna Bari

    • Example 2: A boy from Bangera Bari cannot marry a girl from Bangera  Bari.

    • Example 3: A Girl from Kotyan Bari cannot marry a Boy from Kotyan  Bari.

  • This is because all people of the same Bari are considered as brothers and sisters, since Bari is inherited from the mother’s side (matrilineal system, called Aliya Santana in Tulu tradition).

🔹 How Bari Works in Marriage

  • Marriage must take place between different Baris.

  • Before fixing a marriage, families verify the Bari compatibility to ensure they belong to different clans.

  • Even today, in most traditional Billava families, Bari is given equal or more importance than horoscope matching.

🔹 Example

  • Groom: Suvarna Bari

  • Bride: Bangera Bari ✅ (allowed)

  • Bride: Suvarna Bari ❌ (not allowed)

🔹 Example 2

  • Groom: Karkera Bari

  • Bride: Bangera Bari ✅ (allowed)

  • Bride: Suvarna Bari ✅ (allowed)

  • Bride: karkera Bari ❌ (not allowed)

Example 3

  • Groom: Anchan Bari

  • Bride: karkera Bari ✅ (allowed)

  • Bride: Bangera Bari ✅ (allowed)

  • Bride: Suvarna Bari ✅ (allowed)

  • Bride: Anchan Bari ❌ (not allowed)

🔹 Cultural Significance

  • This rule maintains exogamy (marriage outside the clan).

  • It strengthens social unity by creating alliances between different Baris within the Billava community.

Pre-Wedding Ceremonies:


1. Nishchayam: Engagement ceremony where the bride and groom exchange rings.
2. Kashi Yatra: Groom's procession to the bride's house, symbolizing his journey to Kashi.
3. Ganapathi Pooja: Prayer ceremony to Lord Ganesha for a smooth wedding.
4. Sathyanarayana Pooja

Wedding Day Ceremonies:


1. Muhurtham: Auspicious time for the wedding, determined by astrologers.
2. Gauri Pooja: Prayer ceremony to Goddess Gauri for the bride's well-being.
3. Kanyadan: Bride's father gifts his daughter to the groom.
4. Panigrahanam: Groom takes the bride's hand, symbolizing union.
5. Saptapadi: Seven steps together, representing seven vows.
6. Mangalya Dharanam: Groom ties the mangalsutra around the bride's neck.
7. Aarti: Bride's brother performs aarti to welcome the groom.

Post-Wedding Ceremonies:


1. Grihapravesh: Bride enters her new home with her husband.
2. Moohoortha: Bride's first visit to her parental home after marriage.
3. Okuli: Bride's brother visits her at her new home.

Unique Customs:


1. Billava Samskara: Community-specific rituals and prayers.
2. Tulasi Vivah: Marriage ceremony between the bride and tulasi plant.
3. Kola Nivedana: Offering prayers to ancestors.

Traditional Attire:


1. Bride: Saree, blouse, and jewelry, including the Billava community's signature "Kasithari" necklace.
2. Groom: Dhoti, shirt, and angavastram (shawl).

Food and Drinks:


1. Traditional dishes: Rice, lentils, vegetables, and coconut-based curries.
2. Fruits and sweets: Coconut, banana, Jilebi, Holige and traditional Billava sweets.


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